ENJOYING THE VERY MANY IMPERFECTIONS

If you truly want to be miserable, there are so many things that will certainly perpetuate your misery in marriage. You have to make 3 very vital choices, TO MARRY, TO STAY MARRIED and TO ENJOY MARRIAGE. But before I proceed, I must let you know "Everything will not make you happy in marriage", so you have to brace up yourself for the marriage journey.

1. THE EARLY RISER: You must not expect your spouse to start waking up by 6.am if she/he has always been the 8am riser? So, you either prepare most of the things for the next day a night before together with your spouse or do them alone the next morning if it must be that early? No hard feelings!

2. THE CHORE MANAGER: The fact that you have always enjoyed an immaculate hygiene in your house does not mean that your spouse should now become the chore manager? You either encourage him/her to be more committed to house chores, you also take the lead or get a nanny - That means extra cost!

3. THE MONEY SPENDER: Your spouse might not be good with the budget. Take the lead and plan the expenditure while you make allowances for little bits of extravagance. But becoming too miserly could spark a serious war for a long time

4. BABBLING BROOK VS. DEAD SEA: These terms I got from Gary Chapman, and I have grown to love them. One of the most foolish things any couple could do is to accuse a spouse of talking too much. The former is the talker while the latter is the quiet. You either learn to be an active listener or a heavy talker. That settles it!

5. SPIRITUALITY: You can only encourage your spouse to study the bible, pray, fast or even attend church meetings, but doing it by force is disaster. You have to set the pace. Your spouse certainly will not be on the same spiritual plain like you. Continuously encourage, encourage and encourage.

6. THE CHEF: Some spouses can't cook and to tell you the truth, it's not evil! If you can, teach and teach or better still decide to enjoy how she/he does it until there is improvement

7. WILD IN BED: I have seen a lot of people who mistook sexy waist line for sexual activeness. The fact that someone looks very sexy does not mean that person will be very good in bed. The fact that you have been very sexually exposed and active does not mean your spouse should be. Your spouse might have to learn orgasm from you. He/she might not even know what sexual positions might be. So, before you hang his/her legs, be willing to teach, teach and teach!

There are many more things but for now this will do. If anybody tells you that these will be easy, that person just fooled you!